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8.02.2011

Wait, it's AUGUST?!



Hi friends.  Yes I know it's August.  Yes I know I haven't posted since November.  Here's a run-down of my life:  I'm a mom of 2.5 year old twins who are not yet in school.  I guess I really don't need to say much more than that, but I know my fellow mommy-photographer friends with small kiddos can empathize with the sentiment that, well, there's just not enough time.  For anything.  I'm up until 3am a lot of nights, just keeping up with editing and email.  I am still arm/knee/neck deep in all sorts of toddler-ness, all of which I'll leave to your imagination.  Word World has saved my sanity.  And I won't as freely admit that...yes... so has... Barney.  SHHHH.  Again, it's August.  It hasn't been less than 95 degrees in St. Louis in, what, 40 days?  That means that we're stuck indoors.  Anyone who has ever been around small children that are stuck indoors can feel me on this one.  We're all teetering on the brink here.  That being said, I seriously could not be happier.  I have a rich, beautiful, fulfilling life, even if it is sheer chaos.  I don't blog enough.  Editing is not being done fast enough for anyone's taste.  Neither is the web-design for my new site.  Neither is correspondence.    Neither is getting photos out to vendors.  Neither is album design.  I'm not hanging out with my awesome industry friends and peers enough, and anyone who knows me knows I love a good time with awesome industry friends and peers.   Here's the thing though.  It's okay.  All of the afore mentioned will speed up, in a matter of just a couple of months, because my two sweet little babies will be starting preschool.  I will be back up to speed with everything business related, and I will be a lot calmer, and no one will have to wait on me, and there will be balance.  BUT.  I will be facing the first of those heartbreaking/warming scenarios that moms are forced to face... someone ELSE being in charge of taking care of my babies.  Making sure they're safe.  Making sure they're happy.  Making sure they laugh enough.  Making sure they're kind and loving.  Making sure they eat their carrots.  Making sure that Ollie doesn't actually throw up on anyone and that hopefully he hits a hard floor surface and not carpet.  This is all very, very scary.  I will be thrust back into having the time to have the professional life that my photography and my business deserves.  I will have a neater, cleaner house.  I'll cook more nights.  I'll email and make phone calls in a timely manner.  I won't be pulling my hair out because of the mere sight of my editing list.  I'll remember to submit sales tax on time.  However.  My life, for the past 2.5 years, has consisted of being needed.  And more recently, as they've just grown into their little personalities that much more... being wanted.  Being mommy.  It's all happening so fast.  Too fast.  I know I'll be fine, I know they'll thrive - God knows they're READY for it.  The balance will be incredible and I know I'LL thrive, my business with thrive... but it's moments like these, where it's 100 degrees out and we're all forced to snuggle on the couch, new Word World episode playing, cold sippy cups of milk in hand, Pup-Pup, Ziggy and Tito all clutched, heels digging into my shins and hips, huggies and kisses abound.... I'm just trying to embrace it, breathe it in, remember it.  Hopefully through the beautiful photos that I have taken and will continue to take of them, I'll be able to relive even a fraction of their sweetness, innocence, hilarity... when they're both 15.  Happy summer friends, I hope your lives are filled with as much joy as is mine.

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